Weight loss support with a spiritual element. I will keep you posted on my journey in the hopes that you will join me in becoming the person God wants you to be. Don't worry about being religious. Come as you are.




Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Obligations

There are many kinds of obligations. There are obligations to pay our bills or take care of our kids. Obligations like these are a part of life and must be taken seriously.

Some obligations are self-imposed. We feel obligated to do something we would rather not do. We do some things out of social pressure - like inviting the whole family or people we don't really care for to a wedding or a party of some kind. Sometimes we have to keep the peace.

Some obligations are a source of stress. We don't want to forego making candy because we are expected to and because we have always done it and because Aunt so and so will be so disappointed.

We feel obligated to eat. We feel obligated to drink. We feel obligated to buy gifts and overspend.

I have noticed that people feel uncomfortable if they are given a gift and have not bought something for that person. We feel obligated to buy gifts for others if they give us a gift. Do people give gifts because they expect a gift in return? Have you ever tried to find out if someone was getting you a gift because if so, you needed to buy something for them? Sad, really.

I have known of families who have decided not to give gifts at all and relieve themselves of that pressure and expense. They just get together and have a meal and enjoy each other's company. I would think they would still get a gift for the children to open. How many times have we had to act like the gift was just great when we didn't feel that way? How many gifts have you and I re-gifted?

While I do enjoy giving and receiving gifts at Christmas I do think we have lost the Spirit of the holiday. My mother-in-law used to keep track of how much money she spent on each person so that it was fair. Kids count their gifts and are very aware of equal numbers among all of them.

Just remember we are not obligated to destroy what we have worked for during the holidays. Some things, like the gift thing, are a part of the celebrations. We need to rekindle the reason for the season I think. We don't need to feel obligated to self-destruct. We also don't need to let others sabotage us either.

Are you making any changes to the holiday season now that you are working toward health?

Be careful out there today.



8 comments:

  1. I am making changes. I'm changing the way I eat over the holidays. No different than how I eat every other day of the year! My only change may be an extra glass of wine with my dinner. But maybe not. We'll see how I feel:)

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    1. I plan to have some wine as well. I would rather have a glass of wine and make it last than pop sweets in my mouth one after the other. I did eat outside of my plan on Thanksgiving and was somewhat concerned that it might throw me but I got right back to my usual eating right away. That was really huge for me. There was no guilt trip that led to further overeating. Take care.

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  2. Hey you... thank you SO much for those links you provided on my 'Help' post a while back. They have made a GREAT difference in my perception of this task!

    ~shoes~

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    1. One of the great things about blogging is helping each other. I would love to hear or read your speech when it is done. Why not do a youtube video for us? Take care.

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  3. I think I've outgrown the "obligation" motivation....some things DO get better with age :)

    How ARE you coming on those gifts you're making???? From what I can remember, I think some people are going to feel very VERY thrilled - hopefully not guilty!

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    1. I have finished my second card table cover that makes a card table into a playhouse - complete with windows/curtains, mailbox, and front door. I am going to make my sister-in-law an apron made from fat quarters, and have some other things to do as well. I make a lot of the Christmas gifts anymore but not because I feel obligated! Take care.

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  4. This year all our Christmas presents came early- the condo and the puppy- and it seems that more and more we just don't need stuff to make the holiday season. I'm pretty good with accepting a gift even if I don't have one. I buy stuff during the year when it truly seems the right something for someone- and I sometimes just give it then. I am really trying to keep the spirit of things and actually enjoy them. My big guilt is getting things all up and decorated and cooked and made just lovely for everyone else- too bad if I don't ever get a minute to enjoy Christmas myself. I get better every year with this, but I'm still kind of bad...

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    1. Me too. It's easy to say how things should be but the expectations are there for excess in many areas of the holidays. I have already spent too much. Have a Merry Christmas!

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