Weight loss support with a spiritual element. I will keep you posted on my journey in the hopes that you will join me in becoming the person God wants you to be. Don't worry about being religious. Come as you are.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Update Six


This is the method I am using to gain control of my food/eating. This is the first episode and there are links to other episodes there if you want to watch more.

I weighed 205 this morning which is a 1/2 lb. gain. I know what needs more attention. I have been eating when I felt like I was truly hungry but before the growl. When we have the freedom to eat what we want at the growl, that can be extended to our perception of when we are hungry and I have some work to do in that area. This week will be better. You know that "wave" of weakness/dizziness that will come over you when the blood sugar is low? - I had that a couple of times. A great thing happened at K-Mart while I was waiting on my blood pressure prescription to be refilled. I used the blood pressure cuff there and it was 118/79 and my pulse was 66 - I can't remember when all three of those numbers were in the normal range. Before I started this journey my blood pressure would be in the 180's over the 90's regularly. the weird thing was that my pulse would always be in the low 50's. Now that I am exercising and the weight is coming off wouldn't it be great if I could get off one or both of my blood pressure medications? I would be ecstatic if that would happen. I have to go to the doctor to get my prescriptions renewed in December so I am hoping to be in onederland by then.

Update on our puppies - Belle, the female, had been sick ever since we got her. We had her to the vet three times and then went to a different one and he diagnosed her with either an esophagus problem or a heart problem. The surgery to correct this would be $3,000 and then she would never be strong. We left her to be euthanized. Tough decision. It doesn't take long to get attached to a puppy. I was tearing up the rest of the evening and the next day thinking of that sweet little face and her loving ways. Sarge is a beautiful sable and is going to be a very big adult. He is so smart but then Shepherds are. I read a list of intelligence in dogs and border collies were #1, poodles were #2, and German shepherds were #3.

Duane is getting along much better. The back brace is helping. Hopefully in January when the 3 months of wearing it is up he will be stronger. He has stenosis (deterioration) in his back as well as arthritis so his working days are over and he can predict the weather now through his discomfort level.

Hope everyone is doing well. It's all up to us (that's what makes it so tough - we have to do it ourselves).

Saturday, October 29, 2011

History Lesson

"Those who don't know history are doomed to repeat it". -George Santayana

Halloween is here and there are many blogs commenting on the tricks and treats. This begins the eating season. Are we going to repeat our histories? We start out eating the halloween candy. Before we know it, Thanksgiving is here which is a bigger eat fest than halloween. There is not only the day on the fourth Thursday but some families have two different Thanksgivings so as not to make people choose which family's event to attend. I know one side of our family usually gets together on Thanksgiving day and then the other side will have theirs on the Sunday after so there are two to attend and cook for. After that, there are leftovers which always includes the desserts. From Thanksgiving to Christmas is a blur of parties, family events, community events, Church events, friend events, etc. The break room at work has enough junk food to cause a diabetic coma. Let's not forget the New Year's celebrations as well.

How long are we into this before we have said, "I will start my diet on January 1". Another New Year's Resolution we probably won't keep. My son works out faithfully and dreads this time of the year because the gym is full to the roof with people starting their New Year's Resolutions. It lasts through about February or so and then things clear out again and he doesn't have to wait to use equipment anymore. I have said this before - when we set a date in the future to get serious (aka January 1) we are just giving ourselves permission to eat like we WANT obesity until then. It's another game we play and don't even realize it sometimes. It's another slogan, not a solution - starting over, New Year's Resolution - sounds virtuous doesn't it?

Here's a thought - what if we started a New Year's Resolution today? This time next year exactly one year will have passed. There is nothing magic about January 1. The gym is open today. There are plenty of healthy choices for food today. What New Year's Resolution will you and I make today?

Friday, October 28, 2011

Deanna Needs Your Support

Someone who needs encouragement:


Perhaps you could pay a visit and offer some help?

Deprived - Really?

The medical dictionary defines deprived as "to take something away from and especially something that is usually considered essential for medical or physical well-being".

I have read on some blogs that the blogger added something to the eating plan such as chocolate so he/she wouldn't feel deprived. Others have blogged that being deprived of some special "thing" is what set them off into a binge. They will say that depriving themselves of desserts is dangerous to their sanity. Really? We play such games with ourselves and we really believe we are safeguarding our weight loss efforts through not depriving ourselves of anything. It's a strategy for weight loss. Hmmmmm.

 Like an alcoholic, one drink is too many and a thousand is not enough.

Does a heroin addict use this methodology? Of course, we can then whip out our slogan about "well, it's harder for an overeater because we have to eat something, a heroin addict can leave heroin completely alone". Same for smoking, a smoker can completely leave tobacco alone. Do we really want to use that argument? This argument makes a case for eating too much. It's just really a matter of where we stop. Do we stop before the first cookie or after they are gone? Is that deprivation? The heroin addict has to stop before the first hit; the alcoholic has to stop before the first drink. The smoker has to stop before the first cigarette. Is that deprivation?

Is this another lie that we want to believe? We can open a bag of cookies, eat one, and put the bag away so we won't be deprived. You are stronger than I am if you can do that. I have believed that lie in the past but if I  had been able to really understand what was happening I would have known that I really wanted all those cookies but needed to feel OK about getting started.

We have to be especially diligent through the eating season that begins with halloween. I think people really do believe that not "depriving" themselves is a good strategy. It's our mindset. I like something sweet after a meal. Now it can be fruit, fiber one yogurt, a couple graham crackers, there are many sugar free products on the market now, some of the Atkins products are nice and sweet. Let's think things through before we fall into the "deprivation" and "poor me" thinking that never fails to get us into trouble.

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Eating Plan My But

I was going to have a salad for lunch BUT a friend called and we went out so I had a burger, fries, and shake.

I want to start exercising BUT I can't seem to get there.

There were vegetables and fruits on the buffet BUT there were yeast rolls, gravy, and cinnamon rolls.

I was going to stick to my list at the grocery store BUT these cookies were on sale.

I was going to drink water at the office birthday party BUT they kept pressuring me to have some cake so I did.

Does any of this sound familiar? Do you have any to add to the list? It is so easy to but our way right on up the numbers on the scale isn't it? No wonder we have big buts. Our buts have deceived us into thinking that we really can't be blamed for our poor choices. It's the circumstances. It's the people who pressure us into eating things that we shouldn't eat if we want to lose weight. It's TOM (that one's a regular - it passes). Fat can still be lost at this time of the month; the water weight is just covering it up - another reason to keep our buts off the scale more than once a week. Sometimes I think it is convenient to use that as the excuse if we just happen to have overeaten at around the same time as TOM is expected. I know some of it is real but I wonder sometimes. Some women just feel squirrelly then too and can use food as comfort.

No if's, and's, or but's about it - let's stop with using our but's for the wrong reasons. :-)  I crack myself up sometimes.

I could have had burger, fries, and a shake BUT I chose the salad.

There were things on sale that tempted me, BUT I stuck to my list.

The birthday party was tempting, BUT I just had the water as I had planned.

There were yeast rolls, gravy, and cinnamon rolls on the buffet, BUT I stuck with fruits and vegetables.

It has been a busy week, BUT I got three workouts in anyway.

Have a great week.

Monday, October 24, 2011

How Much Exercising is Enough?

My son was here for a visit on Saturday and he mentioned that he needed to get back to exercising and losing his weight (this will be the third time - he is his mother's son). He has a bad knee and he said the extra weight was causing it to throb at times. He also said that he has lost all his flexibility. I agreed with him and mentioned that the extra weight just gets in the way. Things like tying our shoes or getting in a tight spot to fix something are two examples I can think of.

It seems some of the people out there trying to lose weight cutting calories and exercising like there's no tomorrow have trouble staying on plan. Isaac (my son) was working with a personal trainer the last time and commented how hungry he was. I can remember exercising like that and then really having trouble bingeing (I know this should be spelled binging but it just doesn't look right - what do you think?) because I truly was HUNGRY. The muscles were healing and I couldn't stand it. I remember once I just considered not exercising until the weight was off. I do think there is a happy medium. I know Weight Watchers allows extra activity points for exercising so that should tell us something. It is just logical that intense exercise not only burns calories at a faster rate than we otherwise would burn them and muscles are also healing and that requires some energy as well. If you just want to burn some extra calories without building muscle, walking is the best I have read. We think burning all those extra calories with intense exercise will help us lose weight faster but what good is that if we can't stay on our eating plan?

Is this a problem for you? How do you handle it?

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Update Five

I weighed 204.5 this morning - another two pounds gone. Onederland is just over the hill. It's a hill, not a mountain. I will be there within the month. As you know I am not working on the weight as much as the behaviors. I am waiting on true hunger and then eating small amounts and then waiting for true hunger again. The growl is the signal I am after. Sometimes if I feel that weakness/dizziness wave over me I go ahead and eat without the growl. That hollow emptiness is usually reliable but I have used any twinge I could perceive as permission to eat in the past so I must be very careful. I am also eating what I want. I am not preparing a separate meal for myself however I find when I give myself the freedom to eat what sounds good I am choosing things that support being healthy. Yesterday I fixed soup beans, corn bread, and fried potatoes. I really preferred having a salad so that is what I did. Instead of my attitude being "I have to eat a salad" it was "I want a salad".

I get in the 8 glasses of water most days. I don't obsess about it though. I am exercising 3 - 5 times a week - it is 6 times a week if there are no conflicts I have to deal with but that doesn't happen too often. There is always an appointment, extra hours at work, or something so 3 times is the minimum.

Hope you had a successful week. If you did, great. If you did not, how are you changing things to make success possible? Read my slogan/solution post below and maybe you can turn things around - I sure hope so.


***Our major obligation is not to mistake slogans for solutions.  ~Edward R. Murrow

Tomorrow is another day.
Starting over tomorrow.
I'm OK, You're OK.
It's a new day.
If it is to be, it's up to me.
This is just a temporary setback.
You can do it!
Don't give up.
It's over now.
I'm not going to beat myself up over this.
It's out of  my system.
I'm OK with it.

Have you used any of these slogans while fooling yourself that things are changing as of now and from now on there will be no more off-plan eating until the goal is reached? I have.

We need to convince ourselves that after this one last indiscretion we are staying in control. How many years have we done that? When we say we will start over tomorrow that just gives us permission to overeat for the rest of the evening. We go to bed disgusted with ourselves and resolve that tomorrow will be different because we think we will be different. How long will that lie work on us? If the overeating doesn't happen the next day again, it usually isn't very long until it does because we have our little slogan all ready to go.

Is it a solution or is it only a slogan? We need this protection for our ego. We need to feel like this is only temporary, better times are coming. Let's truly be honest with ourselves and stop trying to do the warm and fuzzy thing to ourselves and others when we comment with the intent of encouraging but are really enabling.

There are several challenges going on now and it is threatening to sign up for a challenge and then slip up. We don't want to advertise to everyone that we weren't successful the past week so we don't update the others in the challenge at all. We go into hiding. It's understandable but not acceptable. A good first step would be to finish the challenge and take our lumps if we have them coming. Just facing facts and finishing would help us get serious. There is some good leadership out there. People who expect success. They will also do their best to get the participants on the right track and keep them there. They can only do so much though. Finish your challenge if you are in one. Find a leader that suits you, sign up for their challenge, and finish the durn thing.

I got the quote from my sister's blog:  jensgyrations.blogspot.com

Friday, October 21, 2011

You Are Beautiful

I was reading oh_mg over at asmallloss.blogspot.com and she had a quote from another blog - bendoeslife.tumblr.com - "The last pounds are the hardest because they matter the least." I have been thinking about that ever since. It was sort of a light bulb moment. When we are almost there, the struggle intensifies for many of us. It is also hard to stay there when we look good and can afford to put some pounds back on because compared to what we used to look like this is wonderful. Someone who needs to lose 150 pounds, for example, has achieved something really great after losing 100 pounds. I know people started telling me I should stop losing when I still had 25 pounds to go when I was in Weight Watchers.

Several of the struggling people I follow have lost a significant amount of weight and are now bingeing and feeling terrible about it. Some are threatened by reaching some number that means something to them like the lowest they have weighed in a long time or being in onederland. Some are frustrated by a plateau or losing very slowly or seemingly not at all. I have noticed some "recreational" dieters who diet when they are in the mood or when they aren't on a vacation or a business trip or when the wind is out of north - the effort comes and goes. That is an easy habit to create if we aren't careful.

People who would never cheat on their spouse cheat on themselves - me included. We need to finish what we started and take as many people as we can with us. This might mean some stronger words but we should appreciate those who are willing to say what we need to hear. In some cases support and encouragement are most helpful.

I went to Jazzercise tonight. It is really fun and I recommend it if you have a class in your area. There is a web site if you need to get that information. I got in my 8 glasses of water. Since I am not being careful to journal my food intake is mostly from memory - raisin bran muffin, protein food bar, apple, banana with a little pnb on each bite, almonds, 2 bites of chicken, 1 small vanilla cone. I ran the 300 mile route today so most eating was done while driving so I have to do convenient things on those days.

Duane is doing well. He can get his brace on and off now quite well. The doctor gave him stronger pain pills and that has helped. I have to do everything now as he cannot bend or lift. I have to carry in the wood, take care of the puppies, deal with the trash, do all laundry - bummer. This winter should be interesting if we get a lot of snow here in Indiana. I will have to do the shoveling. There will be lots of good exercise I guess. The emergency room bill was $1,003, the brace was $450, the MRI was $2,500 and there are more bills on the way. No medical insurance - that's why we did not get the $20,000 kyphoplasty injection - we had to go with the brace for 3 months until the fracture heals. We will survive.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011


I've been thinking about this topic for a few days - Environmental Protection Agency. That's you and me. We have to protect our environments from harmful, potentially dangerous things. We have to know our limits (thanks again Bluezy - I'm getting some mileage out of your comment don't you think?) and keep out of the environment those things that push us past our limits. If you live alone you are in total control of what makes it into your environment. Those who have others in the house have to strike a balance between what is best for us and keeping the peace with everyone else. If you just live with a spouse, you can ask that person to get his/her own foods/snacks and keep them somewhere where you won't face it (locked in the trunk with a log chain around it maybe?) Seriously, they could keep their stash in their vehicles perhaps. I don't know about chocolate in a hot car however. If you live with a helpful bunch they would probably be OK with that. Some people have their own cabinet with their stuff in it that is off limits to everyone else. You could have your cabinet and they could have theirs.

Have you ever kid-proofed a house?  You make it safe for the child. Let's do that for us. I even think a neat and clean house helps us feel better in general (I wouldn't know for sure as I am a terrible housekeeper). I do know I feel better if I take the time to put on some makeup and do something with the hair.

Today I have Bible Study Fellowship first thing. I then ran my ATM route and got home about 1:30 p.m. I growled during BSF so I ate one of my Quest bars on the route. I have had four of my waters so far. I will get the other four down during and after Jazzercise tonight. At my next growl I am going to finish off a small amount of macaroni/cheese and have a Fiber 1 yogurt. I will probably growl again after I am home from Jazzercise.

Without a definite diet plan it is easy to "drift" as I have mentioned before. It also requires vigilance. No matter what we do to get the weight off vigilance is the key. Self-examination and being aware of our motives and our tendency to rationalize poor choices will bring us back to our senses. We want to lose weight without enduring hunger but it just isn't possible I think. Drinking the water helps a little; eating a diet with some "bulk" helps; getting protein in helps but we endured being stuffed to the point of sickness didn't we? Why didn't that bother us? When it did bother us look at the mess we were. Now we have to endure being hungry. That's just how it is.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

The Meaning of Forgiveness

“Forgiveness means giving up all hope for a better past.” - Lily Tomlin

This is pretty deep and I have been thinking how to expand upon it. I think maybe forgiveness would better be termed acceptance at times. Maybe if we can first accept the past, we can someday forgive. Do we forgive someone who hurt us when we were young and that has caused us difficulties that we still have to overcome? Or do we accept the fact that our home/parents/marriage/whatever caused us pain that we must now put away and get on with life? As a Christian I am told to forgive or I will not be forgiven. I too have done things for which I need mercy. If the other person doesn't ask for forgiveness, do we still carry the load of the problem? I look back on difficult times and tell myself, "That was the best he/she could do at the time." Many are not prepared to parent because of their own baggage. Many make a very poor spouse. I think many people when they look back on the person they are now divorced from wonder why they couldn't see those glaring faults. We just have to accept that. The past is not going to get any better is it? We might as well accept that, forgive it, and move on with happiness as best we know how. Is this the best we can do at this time?

I have rehearsed in my mind the things I would do to get even, the things I would say, the power of being hateful in return. Who is suffering here? If thoughts are things and they have energy, is this the way I want to go? These thoughts will create my today and contribute to my tomorrow. Isn't living well the best revenge? Isn't amounting to something, achieving something despite the past the victory over those people and things that we could choose to give the power to defeat our achievement of our goals?

There will not be a better past but the future is looking better all the time don't you think?

Weigh-In Time!

I weighed 206.5 this morning which is a 2 lb. loss for the week. I did not post yesterday's food choices yet because I was afraid this approach might backfire on me. Now I feel secure in letting you know some of the sinful things I chose to eat yesterday:

Saturday’s Eats

Before Jazzercise I smeared a little peanut butter on a piece of whole bread, folded it over, and took my pills.
4 waters during and after Jazzercise.
Got home after getting groceries, had small apple and 1 string cheese.
3 coffees with cream – I got half/half at the store to use instead of the heavy whipping cream I have been using. Might try just using whole milk (I really like the cream best).
Small biscuit/sausage gravy for lunch, 1 Fiber One yogurt for dessert
2 more waters
Salad/mac & cheese/baked beans
2 graham cracker/icing sandwiches
almonds at night

You probably notice I am not weighing/measuring, totaling calories or fat grams or carbs.

As I was making the biscuits from Bisquick I made a very small one for me and I just one ladle of sausage gravy on it. I ate it slowly and enjoyed every bite.

We had some friends drop in and I warmed up somethings from the frig. and we made a salad. The bulk of supper was the salad. I had one spoon of macaroni and cheese and one spoon of baked beans.

There really are no sinful foods. Portion sizes and eating slowly are the key.

Yesterday at Jazzercise I had a little NSV - you know that exercise where you are lying on your back with your legs up in the air and you lift your hips off the floor? I haven't been able to do that for a while. Yesterday I was able to do a few of them. A week ago Saturday I made the best chocolate cake. I sent home 6 pieces of it with my son and the rest of it lasted until Thursday. My husband ate a piece probably each day. I had a couple of pieces of it but it didn't call to me and I wasn't anxious over its presence. There was a time when I would have been really nervous about it, would have eaten it quickly and privately, and finally would have stuffed myself with it so it wouldn't be there anymore to bother me. I realized last week that I was OK with it being around. I can't tell you how many times I have eaten and eaten and eaten that kind of stuff so it would be gone and would not longer be a threat. What was I thinking? I don't know.

This is why we don't give up. It does get better but it takes time. 

Friday, October 14, 2011

Friday's Food Choices

Friday’s Food Choices

Raisin Bran Muffin

4 coffees with cream
1 tea with cream
( I know, I need to knock it off a little with the cream)

Almonds, apple – 4 waters

Food Bar – 2 waters

2 string cheese
100 calorie microwave popcorn
fiber 1 yogurt
sugar free cappuccino

I covered for a vacation today and will do so again Monday. It's a long route and most of my eating is done in the car.

Knowing Our Limitations

Bluezy commented a couple days ago that it was good to know your limitations and go by them. It's really what works for you that matters. (This is close, not word for word perhaps). It made me think. Thank you Bluezy.

Limitations, our limits, the stopping point and all that. Knowing and heeding our limitations is wisdom. Do we know what we can and cannot handle successfully? Do we know it and ignore it? Too much freedom can be trouble. I know I have "tested the waters" many, many times and failed. I thought I could eat one fun-sized Snickers out of the bowl on Mom's coffee table. I thought I could drink wine without then overeating. These are two scenarios that I need to know my limitations and go by them. I know I can't eat one bite-sized Snickers, not ever. I know if I start drinking wine I get a "what the hell" attitude and eat way too much. So why do I keep seeing if this time I can be successful? I told Mom to get rid of that candy dish - it's all her fault you know. I know I cannot open a bottle of wine and just have one glass and quit - that one's my bad. Why did I buy it in the first place?

Creating problems for ourselves really doesn't make much sense. We buy things for the kids or because the husband or wife likes whatever it is is just fooling ourselves. We are in the store by ourselves and neither the kids nor the husband or wife requested we buy any of the junk. We buy it because WE like it. So what if they fuss because there are no Oreos in the kitchen? If that's the worst thing that ever happens to them, they will be OK. This may take a weaning process so they don't notice there is less and less of that on hand. Have a big bowl of fresh fruit in the middle of the table and see how often they grab that without even looking for the junk. Even if we are on a binge, it would be better to binge on fruit than on Oreos. The sugar free products available now are really good in my opinion. The fat free stuff still needs some work I think. A good salty snack is some of the microwave popcorn available now. Weight Watchers has really good recipes for desserts. One that is really good is to mix a spice cake mix, a regular size can of pumpkin, and a can of 7-Up. It's a great cake and the pumpkin counts as a vegetable. That's all that's in it - no eggs, no oil - nothing else. There was another one I like that required two boxes of sugar free cherry jello, 1 c. boiling water, 1 can of diet coke, and 1 can of the reduced sugar cherry pie filling - I think it was 1 point a serving. There was a gal at school who followed WW and always brought that and it was all gone!

Until we get a handle on things, some of us need the structure that plans like Weight Watchers provide. We need our limitations set for us. Hopefully the day comes when we can set the limits ourselves. I'm still working on it.

I'm passing this on because it worked for me today.

A doctor on TV said that to have inner peace we should always finish things we start and we all could use more calm in our lives.

I looked around my house to find things I'd started and hadn't finished, so I finished off a bottle of Merlot, a bottle of Chardonnay, a bodle of Baileys, a butle of wum, tha mainder of Valiuminun scriptins, an a box a chocletz.

Yu haf no idr how fablus I feel rite now!!!!!!!Sned this to all who need inner piss.An telum u luvum
Thursday’s Food Choices

½  of a Raisin Bran Muffin, 2 c. coffee w/cream – took my pills

Ran my route and drank 4 c. water, then ate a small apple

Had two more waters

Lunch was a mug of stew and 6 saltine crackers and 1 Fiber One Yogurt for dessert

Jazzercise – had 4 more waters

Handful of almonds/apple/sugar free hot chocolate

Thursday, October 13, 2011

Thought for the Day



Promise yourself . . .

To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel that there is something in them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.

To think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
Written by Christian D. Larson in 1912

(from my sister's blog - again)

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

I'm OK With That

A few people have asked why I don't do Weight Watchers again because it worked for me in the past. It didn't work; I regained the weight. If we stick to any sensible weight plan the weight will come off. Why then, don't we keep it off? It is super puzzling to me why anyone would pay all that money, attend classes, weigh/measure, follow the rules, and work that hard to get the weight off and then gain it back. It is beyond me. We didn't change the reasons we got fat in the first place obviously but we were slim, could wear nice clothes without looking sloppy, received compliments - why isn't that enough? What purpose was the fat serving that we would want it back? We obviously wanted to reach our goal weights or we wouldn't have gone through all that. How can eating trump health? Weight Watchers probably has the highest success rate of any of the plans out there but I think the long term success rate is pretty dismal.

I read an article once about people who had lost their weight and kept it off for 5 years or more I think it was. The thing they had in common was they did it their own way, for their own reasons, at their own pace. Following someone else's plan means we don't own it. Who among us doesn't know what to do to lose weight? Why then do we order Nutri-System, Jenny Craig, join TOPS, sign up for Weight Watchers, buy books, pay big bucks for all kinds of things? I have done most of these things myself. I think at the time it seemed like the only hope there was. Hope is so important don't you think? The possibility that there is an answer out there for us. Hope is a good thing. Finding our way will be different for each one of us. We need to look at the ones who have been truly successful at keeping the weight off, not just losing it, and study what they do and how they do it.

I am still working on my way which may or may not line up with your way. Waiting for the growl has become a little more general - like it can be a growl or feeling dizzy and weak. Thrice Blessed pointed that out to me and thanks to her for that because I have been waiting for the growl and gone ahead and eaten because I was feeling weak and somewhat dizzy. Determining hunger can be so subjective without waiting for the growl because when I get to decide on true hunger things can go awry.

Many people follow Weight Watchers and I think that is great. Provisions are made for what to do after reaching goal weight. I am just over weighing/measuring, following the rules, writing, planning, on and on. I would rather lose slowly or not at all for a time than doing that again. I am careful to get the water in. I do step aerobics on M-W-Fr and Jazzercise on T, Th, Sat so exercise is good. I do admit to struggling at times with the growl, portion sizes, stopping thing but I am going to continue. I am determined. Hope you are too.

Sunday, October 9, 2011

Challenged Again

I began at 207.5 and this morning was 208.5 - I am not going to blame the scales - that would be too easy. I am still perfecting this way I want to live and be. It is not easy because it truly is hard to wait for the growl. We always use the word "just" - just wait for the growl. I have been waiting for true hunger but then there is the freedom to eat what I want and as I have said before, stopping is the hard part.

If dieting was the way to go for me, I would be slim right now. I have had my weight off twice with Weight Watchers so why beat my head against a wall? I don't know anyone elderly who is still following a diet plan that got them slim. The elderly people I know who are slim (the fat ones aren't here anymore) just eat and be well. My mom always has toast or something very light when she gets up so she can have something in her stomach with the pills she takes. This would probably be around 7 or 8 a.m. Late morning she might have something like cream of wheat or oats. She will eat one more time in the middle of the afternoon and it will be a light meal. I've told you before she doesn't eat after 6 p.m. She's 85, still delivers meals on wheels, drives all over the place, loves to shop at Elder Beerman, loves to go to garage sales - going strong.

My future sister-in-law drinks beer like a sailor, smokes, and is slim and to be around her you would say she is in good health. She is active. She has more energy than I do. Zooms around and gets things done. What's up with that? She's supposed to be half-dead on the couch making excuses for not quitting smoking and drinking.

Update on the husband - I told you about his compression fracture in his back. We went for the kyphoplasty injection (we thought) and the spinal surgeon told him the injection was $20,000. We do not have medical coverage so we went to Plan B - a $450 brace for 3 months to be worn at all times when he is not in bed. We have two wonderful sons who are a great help and many friends and family members - thank God for them all. The fracture will heal on its own in that amount of time is the plan. I have not been getting to my exercise classes because I didn't want to leave him alone but that's not a good excuse either because I could have exercised here at the house - just didn't - maybe I should start smoking and drinking beer? :-)

As we all work on what we have chosen as our "way" let's go for it. It can be done and we know that. I know people can wait for the growl, eat what they want in reasonable amounts, then wait for the next growl. I know this because I've seen the walking, talking proof of it. That's me one of these days not too far off.

Friday, October 7, 2011

The Master Key System

I am reading this book by Charles F. Haanel. It is about "thoughts are things" and how we can bring about the life we desire through our thought life.  I have known people who always seem to have good things come their way. They are optimistic people. They expect good things to happen. And they do. They can always find something good in every situation - it's because they look for it. They know it's there.

Remember the story of the little girl in the barn digging through a pile of horse poop. Her grandfather came in and asked her what she was doing and she said "With all this horse poop, there has to be a pony in here somewhere".

Thoughts are things and they have power. I am still on Part One and here are a few of his points that I would like to share with you:

1.  That much gathers more is true on every plane of existence and that loss leads to greater loss is equally true.

2.  Mind is creative, and conditions, environment and all experiences in life are the result of our habitual or predominant mental attitude.

3.  The attitude of mind necessarily depends upon what we think. Therefore, the secret of all power, all achievement and all possession depends upon our method of thinking.

4.  This is true because we must "be" before we can "do", and we can "do" only to the extent which we "are", and what we "are" depends upon what we "think".

5.  We cannot express powers that we do not possess. The only way by which we may secure possession of power is to become conscious of power, and we can never become conscious of power until we learn that all power is from within.

6.  There is a world within - a world of thought and feeling and power; of light and life and beauty and, although invisible, its forces are mighty.

7.  The world within is governed by mind. When we discover this world we shall find the solution for every problem, the cause for every effect; and since the world within is subject to our control, all laws of power and possession are also within our control.

8.  The world without is a reflection of the world within. What appears without is what has been found within. In the world within may be found infinite Wisdom, infinite Power, infinite Supply of all that is necessary, waiting for unfoldment, development and expression. If we recognize these potentialities in the world within they will take form in the world without.

9.  Harmony in the world within will be reflected in the world without by harmonious conditions, agreeable surroundings, the best of everything. It is the foundation of health and a necessary essential to all greatness, all power, all attainment, all achievement and all success.

10. Harmony in the world within means the ability to control our thoughts, and to determine for ourselves how any experience is to affect us.

I think we can view that inner world as our Spirit, for Christians The Holy Spirit. We can get in touch with this inner world through prayer or meditation.

The exercise for this first part is to sit quietly, comfortably in a place where you won't be disturbed. Let your thoughts go where they may for from 15 to 30 minutes. I choose to pray. I set the timer on the stove for 15 minutes and I did it the first time. The second time I set the timer on the stove for 20 minutes and I got to within a minute of the end. I started feeling antsy and uneasy so it was time to stop. The rationale for this is that we must be in control of our physical selves before we can be in control of our thinking selves. This activity is to be done 4 times at least in the first week.

I have become more aware of spirituality lately and less of religion. I do have a Church I attend and do think a Church home is a good thing for the fellowship and to participate in what the Church does for a community and for believers. I know people talk about hypocrites in Church but isn't everyone a hypocrite? What is a hypocrite? Isn't it someone who professes one thing but lives another? We could even expand this to losing weight. We have joined up, paid up, fessed up, toned up then destroyed it all by returning to our vomit (that's from Scripture - Proverbs I think where it compares those who go back to the old life as a dog returning to its vomit). That visual should also help keep you from eating much today :-)

How is your thought life? Do you need to get control of it? Why not be proactive and do this exercise for 15 minutes of complete silence letting your thoughts go where they may. I THINK you will find your THOUGHTS will go to the good things you desire, to the strength you need for the day, to plan how to get through the day, and to determine the power within that you need to create the world without.

I know I am working on this. Join me? I will share 10 more points tomorrow (there are 42 of them).

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Human Be - ing

I will learn to BE, just BE. I want it to be second nature to wait for true hunger. I will be a human who is be-ing what is natural to someone who doesn't use food for the wrong reasons.

Remember when people used to ask us what we wanted to BE when we grew up? Now we are the ones asking those questions to little ones. What do I want to be? What do you want to be? We don't have to wait until we grow up because we already have and now there's no good reason right now for us not to BE what we want to BE.

I have so much trouble staying in the moment. Even if I pray, my mind can go a hundred different directions. I can't just enjoy what I am doing; I have to be thinking about things coming up, things I have to do, things I should be doing. I spend too much time online and part of the reason is to avoid doing things I should be doing or should have already done. I know this and what am I doing about it? I am going to have to schedule myself better. How about you? Can you and I learn how to be a human that knows how to be? I read in one of my books that every time we go into a room, we should make something right. Straighten a table, put something away, or clean something off are a few examples. That would be a good start.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

New Scales?

I started out at 207.5 - went to 209.5 - back to 203.5 - and this morning I was 211, then 209.5, then 209 (all within about half an hour). I am getting suspicious of my scales. Last night I was noticing my jeans were looser than I remembered.

Do any of you have bathroom scales that you would recommend to me? I think it's time to invest in new ones. I am very seriously considering not weighing at all at home. I go to the doctor twice a year to get my blood pressure prescription renewed and of course they weigh me.  I do think I need to weigh at least once a month so that means new scales. Let me know if you have scales you really trust that are reliable.

As an over-eater I really don't think I can just stop weighing myself. There will be that "drift" that means trouble. I don't even know if checking once a month is realistic. Here is how my brain would work - it would say, "OK, Myra, you don't have to weigh for a WHOLE MONTH so there is room to play." Then about a week or ten days before it's time to weigh it would be, "OK, Myra, you will be weighing soon so it's time to get serious."  Then, it would be, "Let's chalk this one up and start over after this weigh-in." Does that sound familiar to anyone?

I am just going to take my last weight this morning as my turn-in weight until I get new scales - 209 - that's 1.5 lbs. gained since beginning, 5.5 lbs. gained since Monday I think. I will have to think about this. I lost 1.5 lbs. since my first weigh-in this morning.  ????

Welcome Paul


This is his blog:


Paul has just begun the blogging "thing". He will probably get hooked on it like the rest of us. Why not visit, say "Hi", and welcome Paul. His reasons for losing weight match ours--physical improvements, self-image improvements, and health improvements.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

Put a Fat Person in Jail?


Should we judge a person by that person's weight? Does it suggest poor judgment? Maybe it's evidence of a lack of self-discipline? Could it be a medical problem (that one is our favorite, isn't it?) Is this person a poor health risk for a political office that could be left vacant due to that person's untimely death?

I know this is two political posts in a row so I will try to keep my own personal politics out of it. I imagine you have already picked up on the fact that I am conservative. We are all adults and hopefully can hold different viewpoints and still be friends. Just don't reduce the conversation to name-calling and insults. Stay with the issues and the facts and, who knows, we all may be able to make better decisions based on information that is  stated in a mature way. If we can't defend our positions rationally, perhaps we need to rethink things. We could do this through email as this blog really is a part of the weight loss blog community.

This does illustrate the discrimination against the obese and Chris Christie is obese.  Does it affect his ability to govern? Should we take his weight into consideration before nominating him? What results has he achieved as governor of New Jersey? Was his weight a factor?

I am obese and I look at Chris Christie and think, "Wow, he is pretty fat". What is your reaction to his  appearance? Does it matter to you? Would it affect your vote if he was running against George Clooney or Mathew McCoughnahey (sp? I think I really butchered the spelling but you know, the guy with the 6 pack abs)? What do you think about voters in general regarding this? Would a significant number of voters use appearance in their decision or would they take the time to find out about this person's record, this person's stance on issues that are important to them, qualifications, etc.?

I am interested in your thoughts.