Weight loss support with a spiritual element. I will keep you posted on my journey in the hopes that you will join me in becoming the person God wants you to be. Don't worry about being religious. Come as you are.

Friday, June 17, 2011

Comfort Zone

"You will either step forward into growth, or you will step back into safety."

Abraham Maslow

Maslow also authored the hierarchy of needs. They are:

1. Biological and Physiological needs - air, food, drink, shelter, warmth, sex, sleep, etc.
2. Safety needs - protection from elements, security, order, law, limits, stability, etc.
3. Belonging and Love needs - work group, family, affection, relationships, etc.
4. Esteem needs - self-esteem, achievement, mastery, independence, status, dominance, prestige, managerial responsibility, etc.
5. Self-Actualization needs - realizing personal potential, self-fulfillment, seeking personal growth and peak experiences.

Safety. Is that a place without anything new or without anything that makes us stretch or reach a bit? No threats. No challenges. Same ole, same ole. Nothing new, just a different day. While there are few challenges, there is also little in the way of  improvement, progress, growth. When we step forward into growth we step out of our comfort zone and there is risk involved.

What if we join a Challenge and can't finish? Better boof it up now and get it over with. What if we go back to school and can't make the grades? Better not sign up and then waste the money. What if we sign up for a gym membership and then don't go? Better stay home.

Maslow's theory is that each level must be met and achieved or the person cannot move on to the next level; they are stuck. For example, someone who doesn't have enough to eat isn't too concerned about achieving self-esteem. The ultimate is self-actualization which is being our very best and becoming what we are capable of becoming. Most people get hung up at 3, maybe 4 in a few cases. Since 1 contains food, are we stuck there because we feel like our relationship to food is not what it should be? I don't know if I agree with Maslow because as I read the list there are areas higher up the scale that I feel like I have had some success with. There are parts of a level I have achieved and parts of that same level I have not.

We can be experiencing growth in some areas while needing to be safe in others. Have you and I stepped forward into growth or is there that chance that we will stay where we are safe and where we know what to expect? We aren't happy there though or we wouldn't be signing up for challenges and trying yet again to break free from our preoccupation with eating and food. Even if you have already fallen short, don't wait to start again Monday or when the next challenge comes along or when the timing is better or whatever other game works for you. Some of you are new here at my place (welcome, by the way) and read my daily sermon :-) so I want to recommend you read "The Night Lie" from March if night time eating is something you need to conquer. You don't even have to wait until tomorrow - at exactly this same time tomorrow will be exactly one day so start right now. Rationalizations like waiting until tomorrow or Monday or whenever are one of the ways we give ourselves permission to eat as much as we want without being bothered by accountability because we are starting anew and we have fooled ourselves into thinking this time it is for real. Let's tell ourselves the truth beginning right now.

1 comment:

  1. What a lovely quote! It reminds me of things I've read from Marianne Williamson about choosing love over fear. As parents, so much of our responsibility is to help our kids through the frightening aspects of growth. We should spend more time guiding ourselves in a such a way!

    I'll look forward to reading you tomorrow and have a great day.