"Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved."
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While traveling through life, I have made choices that have injured myself and others. Others have made choices that have hurt me. Remembering and writing about my past has proved to bring up a plethora of negative emotions. At this moment I feel pain, remorse, anger, frustration, and am overwhelmed.
Every human on earth experiences these same feelings at one time or another. This is part of what I am here
for. How could I ever comprehend bliss without experiencing misery? How could I enjoy inspiration without suffering depression? How could I appreciate peace without encountering turmoil? I am grateful for the problems life gives me-- partnered with the emotions they bring -- because without the bad I could not understand the good. Everything has its opposite. Things will always change. Things will always get better,
just like the sun shines after each storm. The good news is that even though I may be experiencing negative feelings, I am learning empathy and I am gaining wisdom. And how much more will I value the rays of sunshine that break through the gray clouds?
FROM: Recovery Meditations - OA
This thought of everything having its opposite is how C. S. Lewis explains the evil in the world. We would not recognize righteousness without it. Without darkness, we wouldn't be able to comprehend light. Would we be able to appreciate feeling well and healthy without ever having been sick? I have eaten enough to make myself sick at times, how about you? I wonder why remembering that was not enough to keep me from doing it again? What would make me override that sensation of "stuffed" and keep on? I learned finally. I don't do that anymore. I eat too much occasionally but those binges are over. I remember trying to make myself throw up. Luckily I couldn't do it or I would have been a bigger mess than I was already. We do live in a world of opposites but in the world of an overeater shouldn't we live one or the other and not both? We have the "feast or famine" mentality I guess.
All I can say is I should have a lot of character after this.