Have you ever studied about that "bubble" each of us has around us? It is that distance at which others are kept depending on several things.
Personal space is the region surrounding a person which they regard as psychologically theirs. Most people value their personal space and feel discomfort, anger, or anxiety when their personal space is encroached. Permitting a person to enter personal space and entering somebody else's personal space are indicators of perception of the relationship between the people. There is an intimate zone reserved for lovers, children and close family members. There is another zone used for conversations with friends, to chat with associates, and in group discussions; a further zone is reserved for strangers, newly formed groups, and new acquaintances; and a fourth zone is used for speeches, lectures, and theater; essentially, public distance is that range reserved for larger audiences. (I got this from Wikipedia).
Have you ever felt uncomfortable when someone you didn't know very well stood too close? We would allow a child we didn't know sit on our lap but another adult that we did not know needs to be about 3 or 4 feet away.
I have also read that one of the reasons people put on weight is to place a distance between them and others. As we lose weight is part of what we fear is that people can now get close or that someone of the opposite sex might want to get close? Is this why some get so uncomfortable being slim that they gain back weight because they get uncomfortable without their "bubble". If the fat was our protection, how do we now protect ourselves if the protection is gone? Will expectations be higher now? Is this why we sabotage ourselves?
Do you self-sabotage? Do you have any ideas as to what brings it on and/or why you do this? I am not as bad as I used to be but still have times when I just eat because I feel like I have been in a straight jacket too long. It's kind of an "I'll show you" attitude that I need to get my brain around.